I've been solving the world's problems in my sleep as of late. I've been visualizing my house the way I want it. I've been paining my hallway with a new, darker modern colour. I've been dreaming about what James will be like when he grows up, his dreams and accomplishments. I've been gardening, landscaping and renovating. What I'm NOT doing is sleeping.
Last night I tried all my old tricks. Played my alphabet game...for each letter of the alphabet I come up with a band's name. I counted to 1000 both front and back. My head just felt oddly...open. Last night shouldn't have been like that. James and I had a good day. To be cliche he slept like a baby. He got lots for fresh air, jumped in the Jolly Jumper for an hour and had a bath. I did two hours of raking and gathering leaves (stupid hedges). It didn't get down last fall so it was twice as a pain in my butt as usual. Brad must know he's in the dog house. He came home with flowers. I of course couldn't just say thank you. I asked if it were because I'd been complaining he doesn't do stuff like that anymore. I can't just accept a nice gesture. This doesn't mean he's off the hook. Until he accepts and understands that certain things are important to me, I'm probably going to remain pissed off.
I need to focus on putting my negative energy into losing weight. I've been doing so much stuff around the house when James is sleeping that I haven't been walking or exercising. Getting the rest of my life back in order right now is more important than toning my body right now. I'll tone when I get back to work. Now I have to lose weight. I'll just not wear shorts this summer stupid peanut shaped thighs!
Happy weekend all! I've got a team doing the 5K MS Walk on Sunday so I'll get out and get walking!
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