I lost 3.8 pounds this week and according to MY scale I am officially out of the 190's! I weighed in at home at 189.8! I am so excited! I have been motivated. I have been feeling good about myself. I have been able to avoid temptation and say no to certain foods that have been offered to me. I've added flax, almonds, more vegetables and cut out all processed foods and "white" foods.
Brad? Well. 'Kay first, men lose easier. Second, he has a lot more weight to lose than I do. HE lost 12.8 pounds. In a week. Just by following the same diet I have been. I'm proud of him. I'm happy for him. I am a sore loser though. We have a side bet going on who can lose 20 pounds by December 21. I was winning. And then, he started taking it serious and I started cooking healthy. So I take FULL credit for his loss. I'm the one who got his ass off the couch for a walk. I'm the one gently suggesting what not to eat and what to eat. What habits that should stop. Pointing out to him his unconsious eating.
Yea, I'm a sore loser, however it certainly doesn't help when he is over my shoulder as I type this gloating and teasing about his great job.
I do jest though. He's done a great job. To start eating healthy like this takes a lot of disipline and you do have to come to terms with it and be ready. I'm proud of him for doing this with me. This is the support I so despereately needed in my life and this is the change in his that he needed.
Together, we will be unstoppable! ( I will however be adding a cup of pure lard to all his protions of food until the bet is over though...shhhhhh......)
K
( I will however be adding a cup of pure lard to all his protions of food until the bet is over though...shhhhhh......)
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Monday, November 21, 2011
I feel amazing. I am trying new things that before I didn't think I would like or would be too hard to maintain. Now that we have the proper groceries in the house and have replaced certain items with a healthier or better option, eating "cleaner" is a whole hell of a lot easier.
I am enjoying my lunches of spinach, tuna and eggs. I started throwing a quarter cup of tuna on my spinach salad along with a couple tea spoons of flax seeds, pair it up with a hard boiled egg, a cup of milk and Greek yogurt (another teaspoon of flax) and your GOLDEN! Tonight's dinner was one of my best yet. I made a stir fry creation of my very own! I'm usually pretty unwilling to concoct something in the kitchen on my own in fear that it won't taste good and no one will end up eating dinner. However, I made my own stir fry marinade. A couple shakes of soy sauce, a couple shakes of worshetershire a teaspoon of olive oil, a table spoon of honey, garlic and pepper. Sauteed a cut of sirloin beef, measured 3oz per portion, onion, green and red pepper and zucchini and a side of brown rice. DELICIOUS! James even ate and liked it. Yeah, the sodium content could have been better, but it was a start.
There have been some misses too. Take today's lunch for example. I took two hard boiled eggs, mashed them up and filled a whole grain tortilla along with spinach and some cheddar cheese. It definitely needed something...else. Something tangy. I'm not one for egg salad, so mayonnaise it out. Maybe some dill pickle spears for crunch and tang. Might be willing to give it another try.
My attempts at a total lifestyle change are having an impact on both James and Brad. James and I had a good discussion about what is and is not healthy and why healthy is good for you. Brad has been eating better and making a conscious effort to lose weight. He is even allowing me to coach him a little bit and be a bit of a drill sergeant when I see something he shouldn't do or could do better. Like, finishing off James' food, especially if it is something bad. He's even joined the YMCA so he will be able to use their gym facilities. Yes, baby steps are being made all around and I am proud of us all.
I haven't been able to get in much activity this week other than housework unfortunately. The weekend was busy with family stuff and with the loss of my itouch and running program, I was unable to get out for a run. I'm not happy about that but I am not going to beat myself up about it like I normally would. I'm not sure how well boot camp and possible runs will go this week as I've had a minor physical set back. This morning at 6:00am I began my day by falling down the stairs. All 8 of them, from the very top to the very bottom. I've twisted my knee and ankle pretty badly and have wicked bruises on my elbow and bicep. I'm not exactly sure how it happened, however I am eternally grateful that I was not carrying Piper at the time.
I'm off to have a nice hot bath now. It has been a long day, I am sore and sleepy. Tonight? I'm going to bed happy.
K
PointsPlus™ Tracker entries
Monday, November 21, 2011
Morning
1 serving(s) Multigrain Cheerios 3
1 large banana(s) 0
1/4 cup(s) unsweetened frozen blueberries 0
1 cup(s) black coffee 0
2 tsp flax seed(s) 1
Subtotal 4
Midday
2 large whole hard-boiled egg(s) 4
1 serving(s) Ezekiel Whole Grain Pita 4
1 cup(s) fresh spinach 0
1 oz Cheddar or colby cheese 3
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
1 serving(s) PC Hummus 2
7 item(s) uncooked baby carrots 0
Subtotal 12
Evening
3 oz cooked lean and trimmed beef sirloin 4
1/2 cup(s) uncooked instant brown rice 5
1 Tbsp soy sauce 0
1 Tbsp honey 2
1 cup(s) cooked zucchini 0
1 cup(s) cooked sweet green pepper strips 0
1 cup(s) cooked sweet red pepper strips 0
1 cup(s) cooked onion(s) 0
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
Subtotal 14
Anytime
10 Almonds 2
Subtotal 2
Food PointsPlus values total used 34
I am enjoying my lunches of spinach, tuna and eggs. I started throwing a quarter cup of tuna on my spinach salad along with a couple tea spoons of flax seeds, pair it up with a hard boiled egg, a cup of milk and Greek yogurt (another teaspoon of flax) and your GOLDEN! Tonight's dinner was one of my best yet. I made a stir fry creation of my very own! I'm usually pretty unwilling to concoct something in the kitchen on my own in fear that it won't taste good and no one will end up eating dinner. However, I made my own stir fry marinade. A couple shakes of soy sauce, a couple shakes of worshetershire a teaspoon of olive oil, a table spoon of honey, garlic and pepper. Sauteed a cut of sirloin beef, measured 3oz per portion, onion, green and red pepper and zucchini and a side of brown rice. DELICIOUS! James even ate and liked it. Yeah, the sodium content could have been better, but it was a start.
There have been some misses too. Take today's lunch for example. I took two hard boiled eggs, mashed them up and filled a whole grain tortilla along with spinach and some cheddar cheese. It definitely needed something...else. Something tangy. I'm not one for egg salad, so mayonnaise it out. Maybe some dill pickle spears for crunch and tang. Might be willing to give it another try.
My attempts at a total lifestyle change are having an impact on both James and Brad. James and I had a good discussion about what is and is not healthy and why healthy is good for you. Brad has been eating better and making a conscious effort to lose weight. He is even allowing me to coach him a little bit and be a bit of a drill sergeant when I see something he shouldn't do or could do better. Like, finishing off James' food, especially if it is something bad. He's even joined the YMCA so he will be able to use their gym facilities. Yes, baby steps are being made all around and I am proud of us all.
I haven't been able to get in much activity this week other than housework unfortunately. The weekend was busy with family stuff and with the loss of my itouch and running program, I was unable to get out for a run. I'm not happy about that but I am not going to beat myself up about it like I normally would. I'm not sure how well boot camp and possible runs will go this week as I've had a minor physical set back. This morning at 6:00am I began my day by falling down the stairs. All 8 of them, from the very top to the very bottom. I've twisted my knee and ankle pretty badly and have wicked bruises on my elbow and bicep. I'm not exactly sure how it happened, however I am eternally grateful that I was not carrying Piper at the time.
I'm off to have a nice hot bath now. It has been a long day, I am sore and sleepy. Tonight? I'm going to bed happy.
K
PointsPlus™ Tracker entries
Monday, November 21, 2011
Morning
1 serving(s) Multigrain Cheerios 3
1 large banana(s) 0
1/4 cup(s) unsweetened frozen blueberries 0
1 cup(s) black coffee 0
2 tsp flax seed(s) 1
Subtotal 4
Midday
2 large whole hard-boiled egg(s) 4
1 serving(s) Ezekiel Whole Grain Pita 4
1 cup(s) fresh spinach 0
1 oz Cheddar or colby cheese 3
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
1 serving(s) PC Hummus 2
7 item(s) uncooked baby carrots 0
Subtotal 12
Evening
3 oz cooked lean and trimmed beef sirloin 4
1/2 cup(s) uncooked instant brown rice 5
1 Tbsp soy sauce 0
1 Tbsp honey 2
1 cup(s) cooked zucchini 0
1 cup(s) cooked sweet green pepper strips 0
1 cup(s) cooked sweet red pepper strips 0
1 cup(s) cooked onion(s) 0
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
Subtotal 14
Anytime
10 Almonds 2
Subtotal 2
Food PointsPlus values total used 34
Friday, November 18, 2011
The day the lights went out
We had big plans for today. James and I cleaned the living room while Piper watched and Brad slept in the morning, in preparation for decorating for Christmas. At some point in the morning I placed my iPod on our Rubbermaid set of plastic drawers (the ones I keep all the soothers and bibs in) along with my mug of coffee. As I happened to look over, I saw Coffee (our cat) hop onto the drawers and prepare to jump over to the half wall that separates the entrance from the dining room. I act a second too slowly and the drawers, coffee (the tasty beverage) and ipod go every which direction. DEVASTATION! The coffee (again the tasty beverage) can be refilled. The ipod? $170 to fix or $180 for a new 8 gig. Coffee (the cat) is in the dog house.
I did not realize just how attached I have become to that handy little device until the lights went out on it. It has become my source of socialization while on maternity leave. I hate the telephone, even as a teenager. I'd rather text or email, facebook or tweet. More importantly than anything else, this time around with the baby, that little device (which I had named Harvey II) is my key to weight loss. My running program is on it as is my mobile weight watchers tracking. I find I will track my points much more easily and readily since it is right there. I'm not required to look points up for anything as it is all in my database. All points are kept track with no math work for me to do. I automatically know what my daily, weekly and activity points are at a glance. I can also keep track of my water intake and how many servings of each food group I have consumed. Tomorrow we have to take it back to the Apple Store and I will be without for a while. I'm actually panicking. I was doing so well and I don't know how I can keep my motivation up without it. Especially with the running. The helpful timer and beeping ensured I was learning to run correctly by slowly building up my endurance. Oh please people at Apple, be gentle. Harvey is worth an additional $170 to me because he is my life! Reason I opted to get Harvey fixed rather than replaced? Mine is a 32 gig. The Replacement would only be 8 gig and I enjoy having my entire cd collection and then some in my pocket, ;P
So despite my best intentions of grocery shopping and going for a run, I did neither as we ventured to the Apple Store for NOTHING. We have to go back tomorrow to drop it off (long story). Hopefully I can get one more run in before I have to give it up. Harvey is still operational, just no longer back lit, so very hard to see.
Food wise I did very good. While I did have a sub for dinner, we didn't take the easier way out of burger and fries or any other fast alternative since we didn't get out of Apple until 5:30.
Today was a crappy, frustrating day. It is now over. Tomorrow will be better. I know it will.
K
PointsPlus™ Tracker entries
Friday, November 18, 2011
Morning
1 serving(s) Honey Nut Cheerios 3
1/4 cup(s) unsweetened frozen blueberries 0
2 cup(s) black coffee 0
Subtotal 3
Midday
1 cup(s) fresh spinach 0
1 tsp olive oil 1
2 tsp red wine vinegar 0
1 oz Cheddar cheese 3
1/4 cup(s) water-packed tuna fish, drained 1
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
1 large whole hard-boiled egg(s) 2
Subtotal 10
Evening
Roast Beef Sub on Whole Wheat, no cheese - 12
Subtotal 12
Anytime
Date loaf - Quick-added food 4
Subtotal 4
Food PointsPlus values total used 29
Food PointsPlus values remaining 1
I did not realize just how attached I have become to that handy little device until the lights went out on it. It has become my source of socialization while on maternity leave. I hate the telephone, even as a teenager. I'd rather text or email, facebook or tweet. More importantly than anything else, this time around with the baby, that little device (which I had named Harvey II) is my key to weight loss. My running program is on it as is my mobile weight watchers tracking. I find I will track my points much more easily and readily since it is right there. I'm not required to look points up for anything as it is all in my database. All points are kept track with no math work for me to do. I automatically know what my daily, weekly and activity points are at a glance. I can also keep track of my water intake and how many servings of each food group I have consumed. Tomorrow we have to take it back to the Apple Store and I will be without for a while. I'm actually panicking. I was doing so well and I don't know how I can keep my motivation up without it. Especially with the running. The helpful timer and beeping ensured I was learning to run correctly by slowly building up my endurance. Oh please people at Apple, be gentle. Harvey is worth an additional $170 to me because he is my life! Reason I opted to get Harvey fixed rather than replaced? Mine is a 32 gig. The Replacement would only be 8 gig and I enjoy having my entire cd collection and then some in my pocket, ;P
So despite my best intentions of grocery shopping and going for a run, I did neither as we ventured to the Apple Store for NOTHING. We have to go back tomorrow to drop it off (long story). Hopefully I can get one more run in before I have to give it up. Harvey is still operational, just no longer back lit, so very hard to see.
Food wise I did very good. While I did have a sub for dinner, we didn't take the easier way out of burger and fries or any other fast alternative since we didn't get out of Apple until 5:30.
Today was a crappy, frustrating day. It is now over. Tomorrow will be better. I know it will.
K
PointsPlus™ Tracker entries
Friday, November 18, 2011
Morning
1 serving(s) Honey Nut Cheerios 3
1/4 cup(s) unsweetened frozen blueberries 0
2 cup(s) black coffee 0
Subtotal 3
Midday
1 cup(s) fresh spinach 0
1 tsp olive oil 1
2 tsp red wine vinegar 0
1 oz Cheddar cheese 3
1/4 cup(s) water-packed tuna fish, drained 1
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
1 large whole hard-boiled egg(s) 2
Subtotal 10
Evening
Roast Beef Sub on Whole Wheat, no cheese - 12
Subtotal 12
Anytime
Date loaf - Quick-added food 4
Subtotal 4
Food PointsPlus values total used 29
Food PointsPlus values remaining 1
Thursday, November 17, 2011
You are what you eat
Today I am proud of James and I. I made a healthy dinner, and he ate it. Without being prompted! Tonight I made Wild Salmon brushed with a tsp of olive oil and two tsps of balsamic vinegar, broiled for 12 minutes, a side of brown rice with zucchini quickly sauteed in a little bit of soy sauce, and a baby spinach salad for me.
James ate his entire salmon fillet without any problem at all, and even commented that it was "really good Mommy!". I had to encourage him to try the rice, and he did, said it was good even. Then he tried one of the cucumbers in it (zucchini, but did nothing to discourage him calling it that at the time since he loves cucumber).
Eating healthy and a positive self image is something I am very concerned about with my kids. Today James asked me why I go to an exercise class. I was very careful not to say it was to lose weight or to get thin. I made a point of saying it was to get and stay healthy. I try really had that no matter how badly I am feeling about myself on any given day, I do not project those feelings of doubt and self hatred. Having low self esteem and a low self image is a horrible thing to have and I certainly do not want either James or Piper to have these feelings that I am plagued with almost every day. I make sure to call James handsome and Piper beautiful. I tell both my children I love them and that to me they are special. I want my children to have the self confidence I pretend to have while inside I doubt in myself everything. You can especially tell when I'm attempting to be confident at work and I start stuttering and tripping over my words. The worst is when I know I'm doing it and am aware of it, just makes it all come out worse. The only problem I hope I don't encounter is creating little monsters who think they are the only ones in the world with giant huge egos. Must find the balance to create well rounded creative thinking individuals.
I did not make it out for a run today. Instead I had a play date for James. It was bloody cold out anyway. I will go tomorrow and have rescheduled my run for Saturday (I had planned on resting on the weekend anyway). This works out better anyway. I had three days straight of activity, time to give the body a day of rest and get back into it tomorrow. I was quite pleased with my eating today. I think I ate as clean as I could get with what I had on hand. Given a properly stocked pantry, it wouldn't be as hard as I had always assumed it to be. Still can't quit the coffee though. Almost fell asleep this morning while giving Piper her bottle. So we'll just have to cut it down to two cups a day and go from there.
Tomorrow is measurement day! Let us hope for good things. Fingers crossed!
K
PointsPlus™ Tracker entries
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Morning
1 serving(s) Life Cereal 3
1 large banana(s) 0
2 cup(s) black coffee 0
Subtotal 3
Midday
1 cup(s) spinach 0
1 tsp olive oil 1
2 tsp balsamic vinegar 0
1 oz cheddar cheese 3
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
Subtotal 7
Evening
1/2 cup(s) instant brown rice 5
1 cup(s) cooked zucchini 0
2 tsp balsamic vinegar 0
1 tsp olive oil 1
1 serving(s) Salmon Fillet 3
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
1 cup(s) spinach 0
1 serving(s) Renee's Lemon Poppy Seed 1
Subtotal 13
Anytime
1/2 slice(s) date-nut bread 3
Subtotal 3
Food PointsPlus values total used 26
Food PointsPlus values remaining 4
James ate his entire salmon fillet without any problem at all, and even commented that it was "really good Mommy!". I had to encourage him to try the rice, and he did, said it was good even. Then he tried one of the cucumbers in it (zucchini, but did nothing to discourage him calling it that at the time since he loves cucumber).
Eating healthy and a positive self image is something I am very concerned about with my kids. Today James asked me why I go to an exercise class. I was very careful not to say it was to lose weight or to get thin. I made a point of saying it was to get and stay healthy. I try really had that no matter how badly I am feeling about myself on any given day, I do not project those feelings of doubt and self hatred. Having low self esteem and a low self image is a horrible thing to have and I certainly do not want either James or Piper to have these feelings that I am plagued with almost every day. I make sure to call James handsome and Piper beautiful. I tell both my children I love them and that to me they are special. I want my children to have the self confidence I pretend to have while inside I doubt in myself everything. You can especially tell when I'm attempting to be confident at work and I start stuttering and tripping over my words. The worst is when I know I'm doing it and am aware of it, just makes it all come out worse. The only problem I hope I don't encounter is creating little monsters who think they are the only ones in the world with giant huge egos. Must find the balance to create well rounded creative thinking individuals.
I did not make it out for a run today. Instead I had a play date for James. It was bloody cold out anyway. I will go tomorrow and have rescheduled my run for Saturday (I had planned on resting on the weekend anyway). This works out better anyway. I had three days straight of activity, time to give the body a day of rest and get back into it tomorrow. I was quite pleased with my eating today. I think I ate as clean as I could get with what I had on hand. Given a properly stocked pantry, it wouldn't be as hard as I had always assumed it to be. Still can't quit the coffee though. Almost fell asleep this morning while giving Piper her bottle. So we'll just have to cut it down to two cups a day and go from there.
Tomorrow is measurement day! Let us hope for good things. Fingers crossed!
K
PointsPlus™ Tracker entries
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Morning
1 serving(s) Life Cereal 3
1 large banana(s) 0
2 cup(s) black coffee 0
Subtotal 3
Midday
1 cup(s) spinach 0
1 tsp olive oil 1
2 tsp balsamic vinegar 0
1 oz cheddar cheese 3
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
Subtotal 7
Evening
1/2 cup(s) instant brown rice 5
1 cup(s) cooked zucchini 0
2 tsp balsamic vinegar 0
1 tsp olive oil 1
1 serving(s) Salmon Fillet 3
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
1 cup(s) spinach 0
1 serving(s) Renee's Lemon Poppy Seed 1
Subtotal 13
Anytime
1/2 slice(s) date-nut bread 3
Subtotal 3
Food PointsPlus values total used 26
Food PointsPlus values remaining 4
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Dr Seuss Knows Best
Breathe in. Breathe out. Now silently scream inside your head. Scream even though you knew what the out come would be. Scream and criticize yourself because there was probably something else you could have done. Should have done. Lied to yourself about somewhere along the way. Didn't push yourself hard enough. Took the easy way out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Now...let. It. Go. Poof.
Negative thoughts. Always negative thoughts first. Today was weigh in day for both Weight Watchers and for the Biggest Loser Challenge. I got to watch my weight rise and feel like a big loser! Wooo! This week I thought I did pretty well. I made some food choices I normally wouldn't make. Tried to think outside the box and make the best of what I had on hand in the house already to make due until grocery day (and payday) Friday. I made sure that every day I had scheduled a little red "R" on my calendar, I got my ass out the door. Sure I had some slip ups along the way, but as far as Weight Watchers was concerned, I wrote down everything I ate. Everything.
So what happened? How did I manage to gain 0.6 pounds this week? I don't know. It is a mystery. “Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.” - Dr, Seuss. In other words. Shit happens, learn from it and move on. Sure, I"m taking it out of context, but for my purposes, it fits. Maybe it should read more like: "Don't cry, because it is over. Smile because it happened". Yeah, I gained. I was really hoping to do well my first week of this challenge. But to quote another create "creator" "You can't always get what you want"...but I may just get what I need...in this case, the kick in the ass and the extra motivation I need to make me even more determined, more stubborn and more on target than last week. Ha. That is me. Taking a negative and turning it into a positive.
Trina was great though. I think she really knew how hard the gain hit me even though I (think) I maintained a brave exterior and didn't show how badly it effected me. She gave me the pep talk I needed to hear. Sometimes I get caught up trying to be the best I can be and if I don't see the results, I pretty much give up. I am hard on myself. Extremely hard on myself. I hate to fail and I hate not seeing results and giving anything less than my best. Because of which, I think I often underestimate myself. Must stop that. I will do better. I will get through this. And, more importantly I think, once I get there, I WILL be happy with myself and what I have achieved. I will quit trying to reach for perfection, because that is the one sure way to ensure a failure.
However, as much of a perfectionist as I am, I am still looking for that one thing that I can be happy with, be proud of and flaunt. And it ain't NEVER going to be my butt or thighs...sorry Trina!
“Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one.”
K
PointsPlus™ Tracker entries
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Morning
1 serving(s) Life Cereal 3 - can't give up my cereal. Too quick and easy in the morning and I LOVE cereal. Will try to find a better kind of cereal though.
1 large banana(s) 0
Subtotal 3
Midday
1 serving(s) Tim Horton's Chicken Ranch Wrap 5 - it was a whole wheat tortilla. My parents bought it for me and I couldn't say no. They had it ready and waiting for me when I picked up James after bootcamp.
1 cup(s) black coffee 0
Subtotal 5
Evening
4 oz cooked pork loin, lean and fat 7 - will break out the food scale again for exact portion sizes.
1/2 cup(s) instant brown rice 5
1/2 zucchini 0
1 cup(s) spinach 0
1 serving(s) Sub dried tomato dressing 1 - am out of olive oil, could not make my own. Measured out actual serving size as per packaging.
Subtotal 13
Anytime
10 item(s) baby carrots 0
1 large banana(s) 0
Homemade Date Loaf - 3 - I love to bake...and I needed the date loaf to help out until I am able to get to grocery store and purchase chia and flax seeds. Don't ask. ;)
Subtotal 3
Food PointsPlus values total used 24
Food PointsPlus values remaining 6
Exercise
Bootcamp - 4
Activity PointsPlus values earned 4
Negative thoughts. Always negative thoughts first. Today was weigh in day for both Weight Watchers and for the Biggest Loser Challenge. I got to watch my weight rise and feel like a big loser! Wooo! This week I thought I did pretty well. I made some food choices I normally wouldn't make. Tried to think outside the box and make the best of what I had on hand in the house already to make due until grocery day (and payday) Friday. I made sure that every day I had scheduled a little red "R" on my calendar, I got my ass out the door. Sure I had some slip ups along the way, but as far as Weight Watchers was concerned, I wrote down everything I ate. Everything.
So what happened? How did I manage to gain 0.6 pounds this week? I don't know. It is a mystery. “Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.” - Dr, Seuss. In other words. Shit happens, learn from it and move on. Sure, I"m taking it out of context, but for my purposes, it fits. Maybe it should read more like: "Don't cry, because it is over. Smile because it happened". Yeah, I gained. I was really hoping to do well my first week of this challenge. But to quote another create "creator" "You can't always get what you want"...but I may just get what I need...in this case, the kick in the ass and the extra motivation I need to make me even more determined, more stubborn and more on target than last week. Ha. That is me. Taking a negative and turning it into a positive.
Trina was great though. I think she really knew how hard the gain hit me even though I (think) I maintained a brave exterior and didn't show how badly it effected me. She gave me the pep talk I needed to hear. Sometimes I get caught up trying to be the best I can be and if I don't see the results, I pretty much give up. I am hard on myself. Extremely hard on myself. I hate to fail and I hate not seeing results and giving anything less than my best. Because of which, I think I often underestimate myself. Must stop that. I will do better. I will get through this. And, more importantly I think, once I get there, I WILL be happy with myself and what I have achieved. I will quit trying to reach for perfection, because that is the one sure way to ensure a failure.
However, as much of a perfectionist as I am, I am still looking for that one thing that I can be happy with, be proud of and flaunt. And it ain't NEVER going to be my butt or thighs...sorry Trina!
“Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one.”
K
PointsPlus™ Tracker entries
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Morning
1 serving(s) Life Cereal 3 - can't give up my cereal. Too quick and easy in the morning and I LOVE cereal. Will try to find a better kind of cereal though.
1 large banana(s) 0
Subtotal 3
Midday
1 serving(s) Tim Horton's Chicken Ranch Wrap 5 - it was a whole wheat tortilla. My parents bought it for me and I couldn't say no. They had it ready and waiting for me when I picked up James after bootcamp.
1 cup(s) black coffee 0
Subtotal 5
Evening
4 oz cooked pork loin, lean and fat 7 - will break out the food scale again for exact portion sizes.
1/2 cup(s) instant brown rice 5
1/2 zucchini 0
1 cup(s) spinach 0
1 serving(s) Sub dried tomato dressing 1 - am out of olive oil, could not make my own. Measured out actual serving size as per packaging.
Subtotal 13
Anytime
10 item(s) baby carrots 0
1 large banana(s) 0
Homemade Date Loaf - 3 - I love to bake...and I needed the date loaf to help out until I am able to get to grocery store and purchase chia and flax seeds. Don't ask. ;)
Subtotal 3
Food PointsPlus values total used 24
Food PointsPlus values remaining 6
Exercise
Bootcamp - 4
Activity PointsPlus values earned 4
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Reflections
We're back to being motivated and I'm pretty proud of myself today and yesterday. Especially today. Last night I attended a seminar for nutrition and learned a few things. I have entered a "Biggest Loser" challenge through the trainer I have been taking my boot camp with. I figured I could use all the motivation I can get. Since I'm a competitive person, I need others to know what I am accomplishing and doing.
I'm glad I went. I think it was the kick in the ass I needed. Today I made the best decisions food wise that I could given what we had in the house and got active. For lunch I actually had two hard boiled eggs, roman lettuce, homemade balsamic vinaigrette and strawberries. I didn't think I would be full, but it actually filled me up and kept me satisfied until dinner.
The problem with eating clean and healthy, to me, is that it seems like a lot of work. It is so easy, especially when Brad is on nights, to open up a box of some premade food to feed the kids rather than cook a chicken breast. And not eating sugar or white flour seems next to impossible. So in that respect, when and where I can avoid these types of foods, I will. Otherwise I will watch my portions and give it my all. Combine that with Weight Watchers, I should be golden. Maybe not winning golden, but maybe a nice bright amber.
I have been feeling good this week, which helps. Piper has been cranky as all hell. A tooth broke through tonight so that explains her surliness for the past 4 days. Today I had a fitness high. I made it out for a training run. I love being able to run through the park, there is a beautiful view of the city, it is quiet and everyone you pass smiles and says hello. After my 30 minute training session, I continued on for a walk along the trail. At the end I was able to pause again on the park bench, with a beautiful view of the city and bay, and just meditate. Clear my mind of all thoughts. I didn't care if anyone walked by and saw me sitting there, lotus position, eyes closed, just breathing. Figured, if they did see me, they'd just be jealous anyway. I love being off on maternity leave. There will never be another time in my life that I am able to actually raise my own kids. To watch them grow and enjoy their childhood. It makes me sad thinking that my time with them is half over and this will eventually have to come to an end. I do not want it to end. I am trying to enjoy my time to the fullest. I am sad that I wasted my first 5 months being sad and depressed. I am grateful that I was able to ask my doctor for help and get the help I needed when I did. I couldn't have taken wasting another minute of my time.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Morning
1 large banana(s) 0
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
1 serving(s) Maple Oatmeal Squares 5
Subtotal 8
Midday
1 cup(s) romaine lettuce 0
3 medium strawberries 0
2 Tbsp balsamic vinegar 1
2 medium whole hard-boiled egg(s) 4
1 Tbsp olive oil 4
Subtotal 9
Evening
1 serving(s) Fettuccine Alfredo Sidekick 3
2 slice(s) cooked lean ham 4
1 cup(s) cooked corn kernels 4
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
Subtotal 14
Anytime
1 cup(s) black coffee 0
Subtotal 0
Food PointsPlus values total used 31
Food PointsPlus values remaining 0
Exercise
Run - Activity I created 5
Activity PointsPlus values earned 5
K
I'm glad I went. I think it was the kick in the ass I needed. Today I made the best decisions food wise that I could given what we had in the house and got active. For lunch I actually had two hard boiled eggs, roman lettuce, homemade balsamic vinaigrette and strawberries. I didn't think I would be full, but it actually filled me up and kept me satisfied until dinner.
The problem with eating clean and healthy, to me, is that it seems like a lot of work. It is so easy, especially when Brad is on nights, to open up a box of some premade food to feed the kids rather than cook a chicken breast. And not eating sugar or white flour seems next to impossible. So in that respect, when and where I can avoid these types of foods, I will. Otherwise I will watch my portions and give it my all. Combine that with Weight Watchers, I should be golden. Maybe not winning golden, but maybe a nice bright amber.
I have been feeling good this week, which helps. Piper has been cranky as all hell. A tooth broke through tonight so that explains her surliness for the past 4 days. Today I had a fitness high. I made it out for a training run. I love being able to run through the park, there is a beautiful view of the city, it is quiet and everyone you pass smiles and says hello. After my 30 minute training session, I continued on for a walk along the trail. At the end I was able to pause again on the park bench, with a beautiful view of the city and bay, and just meditate. Clear my mind of all thoughts. I didn't care if anyone walked by and saw me sitting there, lotus position, eyes closed, just breathing. Figured, if they did see me, they'd just be jealous anyway. I love being off on maternity leave. There will never be another time in my life that I am able to actually raise my own kids. To watch them grow and enjoy their childhood. It makes me sad thinking that my time with them is half over and this will eventually have to come to an end. I do not want it to end. I am trying to enjoy my time to the fullest. I am sad that I wasted my first 5 months being sad and depressed. I am grateful that I was able to ask my doctor for help and get the help I needed when I did. I couldn't have taken wasting another minute of my time.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Morning
1 large banana(s) 0
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
1 serving(s) Maple Oatmeal Squares 5
Subtotal 8
Midday
1 cup(s) romaine lettuce 0
3 medium strawberries 0
2 Tbsp balsamic vinegar 1
2 medium whole hard-boiled egg(s) 4
1 Tbsp olive oil 4
Subtotal 9
Evening
1 serving(s) Fettuccine Alfredo Sidekick 3
2 slice(s) cooked lean ham 4
1 cup(s) cooked corn kernels 4
1 cup(s) low-fat milk 3
Subtotal 14
Anytime
1 cup(s) black coffee 0
Subtotal 0
Food PointsPlus values total used 31
Food PointsPlus values remaining 0
Exercise
Run - Activity I created 5
Activity PointsPlus values earned 5
K
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Everything Zen (inside chaos)
I want to lose weight more than anything...I think. Really I do. So why do I keep screwing it up? I become frustrated with the slowness of the process and one day of a whoopsie becomes five very quickly. Is it that I am feeling sorry for myself? Possibly. Even though my weight isn't changing, my "dimensions" certainly are. I took a peek a few days ago. I will technically record the inches on November 18th. But I am so far amazed with the results. Not to give anything away, but I believe it has been more than 2" in a month!
Brad is still at the sabotage game. He went to a football game with the guys on Sunday. And of course, he had to pick up some snacks for the trip over to Buffalo. Before he left for his shopping trip the Friday before, he asked if I wanted anything from he Bulk Barn. Of course thoughts of Skor bars and chocolate covered pretzels and peanut butter filled pretzels and chocolate covered espresso beans filled my thoughts, I said no thank you. Even though I said no thank you, he came home with chocolate covered cappuccino bits. After he was back from the game they had stopped at Taco Bell, he didn't eat his apple empanada, gave it to me to eat. Discovered someone had put a bag of chips into his bag and gave that to me (thanks Andy...jerk!). Of COURSE I know I didn't HAVE to eat them. I know that. Worse yet, I didn't really want to. But I did. Out of habit? Thoughts that go through my head when doing it? Not much actually. I think, "well, one won't hurt" "I'll have this now, since I don't know when the next time I"ll get to have chips will be" "Fuck it". Honestly, that last one is the worst. A simple "Fuck it" and I'm scoffing down Halloween candy like there is no tomorrow. For this simple reason, I try not to allow these kinds of things into our home. Yet somehow, junk always finds its way in through my door. Right now, right above me on the computer desk is another one of Brad's gems. A bag full of wine gums. However, I don't like wine gums, and I am able to keep them out of my mouth and away from my thoughts. Too bad potato chips taste like angels dancing on my tongue in an orgy of salty goodness.
I managed to get out for a "run" yesterday. Since I haven't been able to make it out in a couple of weeks, I am starting over at day one. I'm not sure how effective it is since it was a very slow jog. Extremely slow. I think power walkers could have passed me. My knees hurt. Amazing how quickly your body falls out of it and how long and hard it takes just to get it back. I think what I need to do is schedule my runs on the kitchen calendar. Work it out with Brad's schedule and if it is written down, go on the day when scheduled. When I was out actually doing it yesterday, it was nice to be alone with my thoughts. It was a beautiful fall day, I wasn't at work, I was able to spend time with my beautiful children. Hell, after my run was over I sat on a park bench in the lotus position meditating, allowing thoughts of absolutely nothing fill my head. Just the sounds of the wind in the trees and birds chirping. Life should be that calm and zen all the time. Which reminds me...anyone know of any good, yet inexpensive, yoga classes in the area? God, I miss yoga.
Tomorrow I begin a "Biggest Loser" challenge run through the fitness class and instructor I have been going to. I figure I need all the motivation I can muster. Maybe this is the kick in the ass I need. I am an extremely competitive person and hate to lose anything. I do not expect to win, or even finish in the top 10. I do however plan on giving it my best.
K
Brad is still at the sabotage game. He went to a football game with the guys on Sunday. And of course, he had to pick up some snacks for the trip over to Buffalo. Before he left for his shopping trip the Friday before, he asked if I wanted anything from he Bulk Barn. Of course thoughts of Skor bars and chocolate covered pretzels and peanut butter filled pretzels and chocolate covered espresso beans filled my thoughts, I said no thank you. Even though I said no thank you, he came home with chocolate covered cappuccino bits. After he was back from the game they had stopped at Taco Bell, he didn't eat his apple empanada, gave it to me to eat. Discovered someone had put a bag of chips into his bag and gave that to me (thanks Andy...jerk!). Of COURSE I know I didn't HAVE to eat them. I know that. Worse yet, I didn't really want to. But I did. Out of habit? Thoughts that go through my head when doing it? Not much actually. I think, "well, one won't hurt" "I'll have this now, since I don't know when the next time I"ll get to have chips will be" "Fuck it". Honestly, that last one is the worst. A simple "Fuck it" and I'm scoffing down Halloween candy like there is no tomorrow. For this simple reason, I try not to allow these kinds of things into our home. Yet somehow, junk always finds its way in through my door. Right now, right above me on the computer desk is another one of Brad's gems. A bag full of wine gums. However, I don't like wine gums, and I am able to keep them out of my mouth and away from my thoughts. Too bad potato chips taste like angels dancing on my tongue in an orgy of salty goodness.
I managed to get out for a "run" yesterday. Since I haven't been able to make it out in a couple of weeks, I am starting over at day one. I'm not sure how effective it is since it was a very slow jog. Extremely slow. I think power walkers could have passed me. My knees hurt. Amazing how quickly your body falls out of it and how long and hard it takes just to get it back. I think what I need to do is schedule my runs on the kitchen calendar. Work it out with Brad's schedule and if it is written down, go on the day when scheduled. When I was out actually doing it yesterday, it was nice to be alone with my thoughts. It was a beautiful fall day, I wasn't at work, I was able to spend time with my beautiful children. Hell, after my run was over I sat on a park bench in the lotus position meditating, allowing thoughts of absolutely nothing fill my head. Just the sounds of the wind in the trees and birds chirping. Life should be that calm and zen all the time. Which reminds me...anyone know of any good, yet inexpensive, yoga classes in the area? God, I miss yoga.
Tomorrow I begin a "Biggest Loser" challenge run through the fitness class and instructor I have been going to. I figure I need all the motivation I can muster. Maybe this is the kick in the ass I need. I am an extremely competitive person and hate to lose anything. I do not expect to win, or even finish in the top 10. I do however plan on giving it my best.
K
Friday, November 4, 2011
The Result Blog - And other stuff
I have been remiss in blogging. Weigh in day was on Wednesday. Much to my disappointment and frustration I gained 0.2 pounds. This means for the ENTIRE month of October I only lost 2.6 pounds. I know I haven't been following the program as good as I should. I go days without journalling my food. I don't know what it is going to take to get me to be totally committed to this. I want this more than anything. Because of that, I get easily frustrated and eat because I'm frustrated.
I've moved my kitchen around to make it harder to get into our fridge. You actually have to move a chair and table to be able to gain access to it, just too much work for a snack. Of course, it is healthier to snack from the fridge than the pantry. Maybe a lock on the pantry would be more effective.
Still have yet to get out to do another round of the Couch to 5K. It isn't like I've just been sitting on my butt doing nothing though. I have been cleaning the house. Yesterday I cleaned the kitchen from top to bottom, cupboards, appliances, walls and floors with warm water and a bucket of soap. House smells better at least. Next to tackle, upstairs.
And on that note, I better log what I ate today. The only one who can make this effort is me.
K
I've moved my kitchen around to make it harder to get into our fridge. You actually have to move a chair and table to be able to gain access to it, just too much work for a snack. Of course, it is healthier to snack from the fridge than the pantry. Maybe a lock on the pantry would be more effective.
Still have yet to get out to do another round of the Couch to 5K. It isn't like I've just been sitting on my butt doing nothing though. I have been cleaning the house. Yesterday I cleaned the kitchen from top to bottom, cupboards, appliances, walls and floors with warm water and a bucket of soap. House smells better at least. Next to tackle, upstairs.
And on that note, I better log what I ate today. The only one who can make this effort is me.
K
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