Your chest tightens, your breathing turns first to a pant, then to full blown hyperventalation making it nearly impossible to catch your breath. In most occasions, I have learned to know and feel when one is coming on, take a step away from the situation and just breathe. One I was able to avoid, the other I did not this weekend.
Baby James did NOT have a good Friday. He was sobbing and hard to calm down all day. He cried from 12:30 (when we left him at my parents) until 4:00 when we got back. Even then he wouldn't have a nap or stop crying for longer than ten minute stretches. Growing pains and teething are not a good mix. Didn't get much sleep that night. Not necessarily because he was awake all night, but I am a worrier. "Will the new car sear we just bought fit in my small little car?" "What is wrong with James?" "Will he get over this stage of being fussy at my parents' house?" "Will I ever lose this weight and get my body back?" Friday food wise sucked. Lunch went okay. Turtle Jack's for a fajita wrap with a side salad. Chinese Food for dinner. Whoops. Hey, my parent's bought. We were going to buy them dinner for watching the crank pot...but ya know. Saturday as I was getting ready for the party...I found out a friend wasn't going. Even though other friend's of mine were going, it wasn't part of my plan for the night. I don't like change. I don't like when things don't go the way I thought they would. So I freaked out...had a little panic attack...and stood up the poor host of the party and didn't go. Even though my other friend called and asked if I needed a ride. I said no. I'm a horrible person. So because I was ashamed and embarrased I didn't go to the party even though I said I would, I had Taco Bell for dinner and chased it with a bag of Creamy Dill Pickle chips. Sunday was family day with the in-laws. I did realitively well (ha ha!) avoid the second panic attack by going to the bathroom to calm down from a conversation I didn't want to get into with MIL. Had three peices of veggie pizza from Zarky's (meh...how bad can that be right?). Didn't have any birthday cake...I'm not a big cake person, so that isn't so hard to do. Maybe 10 Ketchup Chips...Brad couldn't find any for me the night before. Of course when we got home...I finished off my bag of Dill chips...*SIGH*!Today am feeling bloated...but that is to be expected. There isn't much food in the house. All my "staples" are gone...baby carrots, yogurt, dill pickles...one egg left...no bread. Should make for an interesting day. Aerobics tonight...so afternoon yoga with the old dvd.Baby is yelling at me.
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